I never thought I'd actually appreciate Progress Report Writing Season--a period so taxing that not only does it deserve capital letters but also a contest among my teacher friends for who can finish the beastly things first. The race to finish all seven rather detailed narrative sections for each student is a fierce one and the loser has to buy drinks.
My process for writing reports is roughly as follows:
Write two students' math sections.
Feel incredibly virtuous.
Consume chocolate treat.
Take a quick peek to see if any new emails have arrived.
Write three more students' math sections.
Pat self on back for such outstanding progress!
Check weather to see how impending storm is developing.
Fantasize about snow day.
Write one more student's math section.
Think of idea for new blog post about effective but reward-oriented helpers.
Fetch bag of tortilla chips.
Think about writing another report.
How about now?
Set goal for what constitutes enough progress to deserve a break. No. Like a real break. The chocolate/email/chips/flossing were just ever-so-brief pauses in a Herculean display of sustained effort.
Think of idea for McSweeney's list.
Put all remaining energy left into writing one more student's math section.
Earn real break.
And so let it not be said that procrastinating from writing progress reports by wolfing down half a bag of Hint of Lime tortilla chips never got me anywhere.
I'm on McSweeney's today!
Read Me on McSweeney's
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