That was my first thought as Cassidy walked in the room this morning. She stared up at me through the new eyewear and beamed, daring me to NOT notice this new development happening on her face.
"I got glasses!" she exclaimed. "Can I have an emergency share about them?"
Now, in addition to the fact that I probably need them soon myself, here is what I know about glasses:
1. The process of going from no glasses to glasses involves many steps, each of which I presume takes dozens of weeks.
2. Children who are in any stage of the vision enhancement pipeline feel the need to update me regularly about their progress. "Went to the eye doctor yesterday--I'm getting glasses!" "I picked out my glasses yesterday--they're purple!" "LOOK, I GOT MY GLASSES and have to keep them in this case and use this cleaning cloth to clean them!"
So "Poof! Glasses!" struck me as a bit unlikely.
"You went to the eye doctor?" I asked Cassidy.
"And the doctor prescribed glasses and these have a prescription that helps you see?"
"Are they to help you see or just clear glass for fashion?"
"Yes. Yes. They're to help me see" she answered.
"And just once more to confirm--they are not fake?"
And so it was that Cassidy spent the entire morning in rather adult-sized glasses, taking them off and putting them on randomly throughout the day. During math, I went over and asked her what the doctor had said about when to wear them.
"Oh, just when I'm walking. I fell during winter break while I was walking so I need to wear them when I'm walking."
"Hmmm" I replied.
Which brings me to a few more things I know about eyewear protocol:
3. Glasses frames should be roughly in proportion to the size of your head.
4. There are several activities that might require the wearing of glasses:
- Doing needlepoint embroidery
- Driving at night
- Deciphering far away street signs to prove how superior your vision is to your wife's
None of these activities, however, include walking.
Cassidy was, I am pleased to report, able to walk quite well and with no vision support needed over to her cubby to put away what turned out to be her uncle's glasses.