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Thursday, April 21, 2011

No Offense to Children

Ahhh.  Spring break.  A time to stop and relax for a minute, to succumb to germs as soon as I do stop and relax for a minute, to visit with friends and family, and...to recover from the germs.  Check, check, check, and...working on it.

It's also the perfect time to go through my list of quotes from kids and dig out something good.  I make sure to jot down overheard comments right away and then file those to pull out on one of those days for a little laugh.

What I've pulled out for today are a couple of "no offense to children" moments.  Sometimes you've just gotta tell it like it is--even if that means bad-mouthing your own fellow youngsters worldwide.

During book club one day a few weeks ago, I was glad to have my clipboard handy for jotting down one of Lucas' comments.  The kids were discussing the book Superfudge and the antics of its various characters.  Those children--always up to somethin'.  When they were discussing one surely child-caused predicament in the book, Lucas declared, "No offense to children, but children aren't as intelligent as adults."  The other children in the book club group didn't seem to take offense.  The adult in the book club group grabbed a pen.

Whatever Lucas' declarations of the intelligence of children, I will say one thing about kids.  They are messy.

One day recently, a spill of food appeared near but not quite in the trash can during lunch "clean" up.  While I generally get a few eager helpers to volunteer to clean up someone else's mess, and I appreciate this, I almost never get someone taking responsibility for having caused the mess...

Darien volunteered to lend a hand with the mashed potatoes and peas and we both knelt down to attack the spill with some paper towels.  I figured we would share in a little head-shaking at those sloppy eight-year-olds and reminisce together about how children used to be back in the good ole days.

"Kids these days, huh?" I said to Darien, sure he would appreciate the utter hilarity in my ironic comment.  Get it?  I'm talking to you as if you're a grown up, too.  Darien, however, failed to share my lament.  Instead he, well, took offense.  "I'm one too!" he exclaimed.  Perhaps I should have started with a "No offense to children....."


Nate said...

No offense to children, but Spring Break is awesome!

Sarah said...

That was clearly your mistake! Always lead with "no offense" haha :). I need to start carrying a notebook and a pen with me like you do...